After simultaneously training in two different affiliations for the past two and a half years, I finally made the leap. Now I’ve gone from a guest in Birankai to becoming a visitor at the Iwama dojo that’s been my home for a decade. It was extremely difficult, and the discussion with Sensei was spiked with anger, honesty, guilt and sadness, but we both knew the change was inevitable.

I’ve switched dojos before, unintentionally alternating between aikikai and CAA (formerly AANC) organizations, but always because of a move or some other major life alteration. This time it was simply the choice of development over intimacy, of the personal path over the group, and of the preference for an atmosphere of encouragement by respect over one primarily motivated by criticism. I suspect O-Sensei may have understood.

I began cross-training initially in preparation for my dan test, with the approval of my teacher (we held classes only twice a week). Years before I also trained at our parent dojo, but my teacher’s Sensei was explicit in his ambivilence, and finally in his objection. This lead me “away from home” where I became more and more impressed with my new community. It appeared that they cared for the dojo, kept it clean and well maintained, not out of guilt or some expectation of “misogi” but simply out of respect and caring. Their training was equally supportive: it could be as “hard” as anywhere I’d been, yet also gracefully soft and permissive as required. That there was little competition was testiment to a tone established and reinforced by the Dojo-Cho. Unlike many dojos, it wasn’t about what you were doing wrong, but what you were doing right.

There’s the old story about the competition between the sun and the wind, with the wind insisting he was the stronger. “See that traveler down there?” said the wind, “Let’s see who can make him take off his coat!” And so the wind began to blow. Yet with every increasing fierceness all that he accomplished was to make the traveller turn up his collar, drop his chin, and grab his coat more closely about his chest. When it became the sun’s turn he simply smilled and, giving off his gentle warmth, stilled the wind and cleared the clouds to reveal a splendid spring day. And soon, of his own volition, the traveler simply wiped his brow and took off his coat. O-Sensei perceived that an atemi need not connect to be effective.